Tuesday, May 4, 2010

I could really use a wish right now...

Looking out the window, she didn't see much. Not that she expected to so late at night. Wiping at her face, Marie shook her head, wishing for all the world that she'd just kept her damn mouth shut. It didn't matter if it was eating at her before. Now it was consuming and she wanted to punch a wall, cry and go to sleep for days all at same time. Some might call that depression. For the blonde, it was a daily way of life. Her emotions were always so up and down. Most days, when she actually thought about it, it was frustrating and she wished she could change. And she had tried. It just never seemed like it was enough.

It didn't help that after the fight, she'd laid down to cry, to just let it all out. That was seven the night before. Now, nearly four am, she had a full night's sleep and nothing to do but stare out the window. The feeling of loneliness and the desire to pick up the phone, to try to make this better was overwhelming. But calling that early in the morning probably wouldn't help heal any wounds. Even she wasn't that stupid.

She reached for the radio, turning the nob and hoping for something to make it a little easier to be awake. Or, better yet, lull her back to sleep. The song had a decent beat and some piano and she lay her head back on the pillow as the woman sang about needing a wish and being willing to use just about anything to get it. Then there was some rapping but the woman's voice, her words were what Marie focused on.

The realization that it was her fault wasn't new. But in her trying to branch out, trying to find something that might make it a little easier to deal with all this, she didn't realize what she was doing to the people who had been there the whole time. In making friends, she's managed to alienate the one person who had her back, who had been with her through everything. Brilliant.

Making a note to download it, the music actually did it's job and Marie found herself humming softly as she drifted again, just hoping that she'd sleep until her alarm. She had a lot to do come morning.

2 comments:

  1. So glad to read your post...nice job...now I'm wondering what Marie has to do!
    Keep up the good work! You go, girl!

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  2. good fun stuff...I am keepin a lookout for Marie!
    Good blog btw!

    wishes
    Scribblers Inc.

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