It has definitely been a while.

I know that I am yet again giving apologies, but there was some family things that I needed to take care of. My grandmother passed away at the end of July and to be quite honest, I hadn't done anything the week prior to her passing and since then. It's been emotional and draining and I didn't have much in me.

Now, I've started something that I've been toying with for over a year now. And, it's definitely NOT easy. It entails creating my own mythology surrounding a kind of creature, making it work, using what's there, melding it to what I need. It is so much work, but I'm kind of jazzed about it. I have index cards in different colors on my doors at the moment and its kind of funny. They're all grouped together by different catagories. Seems a little more orderly than I usually am, but we'll see how it works.

For now, I'm going to go try to write as much as I can tonight. I don't get a lot of time to work since I've got a full time job, but since other authors make it work, I've got to suck it up and do this. No more excuses.

Do You Honestly Expect Me To Believe We Could Ever Be The Same?

So, it's been kind of a crazy week with everything that's been going on. No excuse, but I let most things get away from me. But considering I've become productive again, I'm just gonna take it and run with it.

I spent two hours writing in Barnes and Noble yesterday. Sometimes I do my best writing in places like that, where I have my music on really loud so I can't hear anything but I can see people moving around and doing things, interacting. So I'm not completely detached but I can focus on what I'm doing. Ended up needing a new notebook which is very exciting. I rewarded myself with new pens and post its. I love post its. They're my weakness; ask anyone. My family used to put them in my Christmas stocking. It's a sickness.

Anyways, this new idea is stemming from one that I'd mentioned previously regarding the guy who was in the Army. Well, I have an actual plot idea, which is pretty cool so I'm trying to write as much as I can. He's interesting and I'm still diving into him. For a while, there won't be anything typed up, either. I'm going to do what I did in college when I wrote stories or fanfiction (yes, I was one of those. Still known to dabble when the mood strikes. Don't judge.) where I wrote everything out by hand first and then from paper to computer was a revision. We'll see how well that goes.

So Wrap Around Me and Baby, Let's Dance

It seems that I have discovered something. The more emotionally involved I feel in a story, in a character, the more it sticks with me.  (Okay, so that part isn't news to me, but here is the good stuff, I promise.)  But if I'm too invested, if I think too much about the characters, what I want them to do, or if I put too much of myself in them, I never seem to finish what I'm working on.  I was writing the other day to a lyrical prompt I gave myself about a girl who just found out about a friend's engagement.  Since that had happened to me that day (literally an hour or so before), I couldn't finish it.  It wasn't something I wanted to read, let alone write.  This whole thing is trial and error; I suppose that makes each error a learning experience and I should just chalk it up to that.  

Disappointment is an emotion I seem to be feeling a lot lately.  Not just in regards to work, though that's there, but in regards to family, friends, finances.  As good as things are, there are still life's disappointments. Someone didn't come over when they said they would.  Another friend decided to go someplace without you.  A family member forgot your birthday.  Your good friend wasn't sympathetic when you needed he or she to be.  But sometimes you need to store that away for another day.  Sometimes it's just not the time for that story about the girl who's friends all seem to be getting married or having babies.  Maybe now isn't that time for a novel about a young woman holding out for her soulmate.  Maybe now is the time for stories about finding love or starting fresh.  Maybe if you write about what you want to happen, about positive things (not personal things), it'll be easier.  Or maybe it'll be that day to write something that makes you cry, just so you get it out and can move on.

A Fun and Interesting Evening

So tonight I went to church with a friend.  While there, the main message of the night had a lot to do with letting ourselves be healed from the inside out.  I have a feeling that there might be some kind of spirituality for the main character in my book.  After everything that people go through, something has to give them hope, something has to keep them moving forward.  It isn't easy.  Kind of like writing.  Nothing is easy in this world, but it can bring a person joy.

After church, we stopped by a going away party for a friend.  And it was rather epic.  We had a lot of fun, laughed a lot.  It reminded me why I like my job and why people are interesting.  Everyone has little personality quirks and it makes things like going out and playing some games and drinking all the more entertaining.  It felt good to laugh like that. Its the little things that add to the joy.

The real question is then, what makes a character tick?  Do they focus on the positive when they can?  Do they take joy in the little things?  That's the real question that needs to be answered when pushing towards what motivates a character.